Monthly Archives: July 2018

Honoring My Uncle, James Solomon

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The remains of my uncle, James Solomon, who died as a 19 yr. old sailor on the USS Oklahoma at Pearl Harbor, have finally been identified and returned home to Texas. He will be buried on Saturday with full military honors in Forestburg, Texas, so, I am flying to DFW tomorrow and will join my family in honoring him on that day.

Forestburg is a tiny farm and ranching town about 2 hrs. northwest of Dallas and I will get to see, not only my brother, his wife, my sister and several close family members, but also a number of cousins from near and far. I don’t think any of us really knew that James was not actually buried there in the cemetery by his mother – I sure didn’t – but I’m glad DNA technology was finally able to help resolve this and get him home. JS

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Liberals are taking to battle on the 4th of July, 2018

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Another 4th of July is upon us today, another day to say HAPPY BIRTHDAY, AMERICA! and be grateful that we live in a country where we even have the right to spout differences of opinion about anything. That’s not true in all countries. The trick to it all, then, is remembering that we are still one nation and one people, all of us wanting the best for each other, in the long run. Or, we should be. JS

According to right-wing blabbermouth Alex Jones, the left is planning a civil war today. I didn’t get the memo – just read it on Facebook which, I must say, is rather disappointing. I mean, if it’s a potluck, too, we could bring all of this artichoke dip and watermelon left over from yesterday, but we have guests here, so, I just don’t think we can make it. Still, we’d like to be supportive – can we send a check? JS

After reading a funny facebook post that started with, “In the Civil War today, we lost Commander Betty White…” by Joseph David Dacus, I came up with my own July 4th action post:

STEF (Major Neyhart) CAPTURED A FLAG! I begged her not to go, but it’s hard to call her down when she’s determined.

Through the haze of gun smoke, she raced alongside Lt. Toby to what she thought was the home of a Trump supporter, scaled the back fence and yanked that flag off the pole. Lt. Toby bravely kept their dog in check by peeing numerous times along the fence line and barking at nothing in particular. Although bombs and grenades were bursting all around, they made it back through the smokey, shrapnel-filled night, both of them with big grins on their faces like they’d just won the decathlon.

I could see them running through the smoke and watched in horror as Major Neyhart sustained a wound to the right shoulder. Luckily, her arm was already in a sling from recent shoulder surgery, and, true to form, she shrugged off her injury and asked me for a Band-Aid. Equally lucky, I had swiped some from Walgreen’s earlier in the day’s battle. Imagine our surprise when the flag she stole turned out to be a RAINBOW FLAG! Our street is way cooler than we even knew! Gen. Jodybob

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Liberals are taking to battle July 4th, 2018

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My friend, Capt. Judy Miller-Keay, has reported that the rebels have held strong and successful at the Siege of Penzey’s in the Sellwood section of Portland, Or., which brings me great relief. The thought of seeing such a great herb shop floating in a sea of red MAGA hats was almost more than I could bear. Where else could we all get a really decent herbs de provence? I mean, really.

Random bursts of gunfire blurt out every so often in the distance and I heard an ambulance siren earlier, but things are much more quiet today and I am grateful for that. Perhaps, we can all begin to heal. Maj. Neyhart found a definite bullet hole in my pack, although we have failed to find a bullet in my body, nor do I feel the least bit paralyzed, and even tested myself by doing the macarena in the kitchen while smearing peanut butter on my toast. Her shoulder seems better, although she was definitely wounded. Lt. Toby only has some minor powder burns on his paws. My horse Dickens, however, has already begun his rehab and is swimming in our pool. JS

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Hurrah for beautiful people and good times

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Big day yesterday and, as it turns out, loads of fun, too. Sam and I drove to Eugene to pick up Sarah and Ruthie, then we drove to Portland for a delightful rooftop wedding in the Pearl District of downtown Portland, of two young people who have been together for 14 years – since they were in high school. I had not seen Melissa since she was a teenager, nor had I ever met her fella, a sweet guy named Adam, and I kind of wondered if Melissa would even remember me. I was wrong about that. She was thrilled to see all of us and was so grateful we had driven so far for her wedding.

Melissa was raised by our two dear friends, Sharon and Robin, and co-parented by Sharon’s ex-husband, Bob. I’d say they all did a great job with this wonderful young woman. Introducing me to Adam, she said, “This is Jody, Stef’s longtime partner – oh, wait! – you’re a spouse now. You guys got married, right? ” I replied, “Yes, we did. We finally got included in WE, THE PEOPLE…, so we tied the knot.” Melissa said, “You know, lots of people couldn’t figure out why Adam and I waited so long to get married, but I didn’t want to get married until it was legal for my moms to get married, too. Unless everyone has the same rights as everyone else, really, it all feels like bullshit to me.” Wow. Like I said, they all did a great job with this girl. I get tears in my eyes now just thinking about it.

So, after a very sweet wedding and dinner, some sterling toasts to the newlyweds and some serious socializing, Stef, Sam and I drove the 3 hours back to Roseburg and arrived about 1:30am. Toby was beside himself, as you might imagine, even though I’d promised him we’d be coming right back. So, today might be a lazy day. I haven’t decided yet, although I am leaning seriously in that direction. JS

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